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“Not I, nor anyone else can travel that road for you.You must travel it by yourself.It is not far. It is within reach.Perhaps you have been on it since you were born, and did not know.Perhaps it is everywhere - on water and land.”
― Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass
Last week = Sunny skies, Ocean Kayaks, Pineapple smoothies, Moonlit swims, and Dark Chocolate ummmm... Are you jealous, yet? What if I added eight dollar beach massages to that list? Hehehe? Am I evil? Yes, I think so.Well then I guess you'll just have to visit me. Not to experience my evil side, but rather to partake in the Earthly heaven known as Thailand. When you deplane you will understand more clearly. There are practically wingless angels on every street corner, who sell fresh papayas, mangos, pineapple and watermelon. And Every time they sell enough fruit, they float into Heaven to get rewarded the prettiest wings in all of God's Heaven.So you must come to visit this 8th wonder of the universe. However, I won't let you in-country unless you promise to pack in ample HIGH-quality dark chocolate And sufficient cheese to last me for the next three months. And if you succed in your mission, I will provide the above list of perks WITH a daily supply of coconut water and so many fresh papayas that your skin will turn Orange!Are you excited?I am normally not so generous with my Papaya. No, I usually guard it with my life. All Papaya thieves' hands are quickly tarred and feathered!But I have to change my tune, because, you see, I DID eat so many papayas that my skin has turned ORANGE. So orange that when I went to Americaland for Christmas half of my family asked me if I bathed in carrot juice in Thailand and the other half asked how much my full body tattoo cost me. Oooops! So I got their slight hint that maybe, just maybe, I needed to ween myself off my IV drip diet of papaya, sweet potatoes, and pumpkin deliciousness. I am slightly depressed from the lack of the 3 most important foods, but I'm using the patch, the 12 step cleansing program, and day-by-day I'm turning slowly, but surely back to my transparent state of whiteness. My grandmother would be proud.So in my new state of transparentness last week I spent the my days beach bumming, fruit shake slurping, kayaking, and just learning the value of being and enjoying the company three of the coolest ladies on the planet. Life is good.
I’ve made it back safe and sound to the land of Sunshine and Smile. The 27 hours of plane torture were well worth the 80 degree weather and the .50 cent pineapples and two of my bestest friends who greeted me soon after I deplaned. :)I’m now in Bangkok for the first time! It’s not really as bad as I thought it would be. I had avoided this monstrous place for the past 8 months believing that I would be walking into a dangerous land of pick-pockets and hair pullers, but have been pleasantly surprised that no one has even once tried to pull my pony tail! The Thais are just such gentle people.But tomorrow we're leaving the big city behind and guess where we are off to? The beach! I’m pee your pants kind of excited. I know I’ve lived here for 8 months, but you see I’ve never ventured to the beach.I live in the mountains so I have not even once been to the south to stick my big toe into the salty ocean. Nope, never! Can you believe it? I can’t either! And tomorrow My besties and I are going to take a well deserved trip to the ocean. I don’t think I’ve been to the ocean for almost 2 years!We're bringing loads of Trader Joe’s sunscreen, UNO cards, flip flops and just enough money to buy an I.V. drip of fresh pineapple juice 24/7. Oh! This will be the best beach trip to date! 
Mandy and I had wonderful weekend in Florida spending time with Ashley and Jeff's family and photographing their wedding. The rain scared us a bit, but in the end it was just perfect! Thanks guys for allowing me to photograph your wedding. It was a beautiful affair. And Thank-you, thank-you Mandy McConaha for coming down to Florida with me and photographing the wedding with me. I had an awesome time. Here are just a few of the photographs we captured.
So I'm off to the beach today. I heard it's crazy, and full of weird people, who do weird things and wear weird clothes. And I'm told they do all of these oddities in order that I can take their pictures. Really? it's amazing I know. people do love me so! They must know that I will fit in with them... I'm excited. The beach is called Ocean City and I believe that it would be considered the trashy beach around here, yet everyone goes, of course that means I'm going too to experience the insanity... I was thinking about instead going to a quieter, nicer beach, who wants pictures of sunsets and pretty water? Do you really want to see another one? You know you appreciate crazy people. You just won't admit it. Without them life would be one endless Saturday at the AYSO soccer fields where your surrounded by cardigan-claded moms who discuss their children's personal information with perfect strangers and the only substance you can eat is those horrific excuses for food lunchables and the only thing that quenches your thirst on this hot, endless day is Sunny D... Yes, my friends this is the life of the "normal" people. (you go ahead and remain in the search for normalcy; it's your funeral)...But I on the other hand Thank heaven for Hippies, Nudists, People that wear costumes, the crazy cat lady, weird families..... sorry to interupt but I believe my Ecuadorian ride is here or almost. I got up at 5:15 because I thought I would be picked-up around 6 well right now it's almost 7, yup I know, I know. Like my aunt ethel( may her poor decomposing soul rest in peace) always use to say--punctuality is the closest thing to godliness, so tardiness must the closest thing to... , yup I think you know what tardiness is close to. the place were Mean Old Man Jones probably went or the crazy cat lady's black cat, the one whose eyes glowed every full moon. but what can I dooo? I'm an innocent bystander to these blasphemies. So I believe that the second half of the post will be about the beach and maybe have some pictures from it, but you never know I might be inspired and then start talking about how much I like crabs, which at the very least would make Brooke laugh, but make everyone else wonder why brooke would laugh and of course the eternally asked question of why it is that I write a blog, and if my parents decided to read this post, not likely, they will praise the heavens for the millionth time today that I don't make a living with words. The poor World if I did; but really more importantly than the world - My poor bank account! If I wrote for money, The only thing I would ever eat would be bean and rice. Oh wait, ::Inge realizes something very important about her life; her life becomes a crystal clear in front of her very eyes: what is this realization you ask? the only thing that she eats now is beans and rice with a side uh..... beans and rice?:: OH Shiznick! I'm panicking! Am I allowed to have a mid-20's crisis before I'm in my mid-twenties? because I would really like to have the permission to go legally insane. But is there a quota to how many mid-(insert noun here) crisis you can have? If I have one in the 20's, I might run out of crisis by the time mid-life come, and then I'll have no energy to have a mid-life crisis. and everyone know it just looks bad if you don't have a mid-life crisis. Like you become unrespectible or something, like the kid who gets picked last for the game of volleyball. I would be a disgrace to the family; I will be the "One" ::the one the everyone talks about with a disapproving voice. I will be aunt whose life is used as a conversation piece when there's an awkward silence around the dinner table or when ::Family Member 1:: have you heard what what happened to Inge?Family Member 2: No, want happened?FM1: well let me tell you....[insert nasty hateful words] FM2: [inserts their own nasty words and finish the nasty comments with --> well, bless her heart.FM1: Yes, bless her poor little heart. I would be completely, totally and eternally ostracized without hope of returning to Sunday dinner table to eat Granny's Spaghetti and Meatballs. Lord, you know I couldn't handle it: the Spaghetti-less life. A fish out of water, a bird without wings, a fat lady without a song, or a catholic without guilt! Oh Please! Just give me the strength for a mid-life crisis, that all I ask. Ok enough of that I am going to crawl into a cave of beans and rice and eat myself to death. or bloat myself to death because I'll probably I run-out of bean-O. ::note to self:: pack extra-strength Bean-O and Febreeze the vanilla scent because the vanilla is the best.. I'm an expert on these sort of matters. I'm think of starting a business with my wealth of knowledge;)Moving on photos of Ocean City and some of the random people I met there. They come from all over the world (Russia, Taiwan, Japan, etc.) to work and live in Ocean City for the summer and then they return to their countries with this perfectly unAmerican, but all at the same time American experience under their belts. For all my East Tenneseans out there in internet land. it's like living in Gatlinburg for the Summer and saying that you've had the Tennessee/Smoky Mountain experience. It's just not true. It's a lie I tell you: a lie! Oh and you know, if you want you can leave me comments. that's would be cool. ( in other words Inge's self-esteem is tied to the amount of comments she gets; but don't tell her I told you that because then she'll get mad at me. and then beat me. I don't like to be beaten.It hurts.) --->
